This week’s “U mad, bro?” turns ugly for Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin, quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and owner Art Rooney II.
Penguins fans take a little slap. We get a 2021 Pirates reality check. There’s a thorough examination of Cold War-era Europe. And I call out one of my TribLive colleagues.
Because he deserves it!
I’ll get to sports stuff in a moment. But I have to start with this tweet that personally made me mad. It comes from my TribLive compatriot Chris Adamski.
Let’s have a discussion about white chocolate. Yay or nay? pic.twitter.com/Y933msO19d
— Chris Adamski (@C_AdamskiTrib) February 18, 2021
No, Chris. We shouldn’t have a conversation about white chocolate. Ever!
In fact, let’s never speak of it again. Let’s act as if it doesn’t exist. Let me live in a world where I can pretend that white chocolate wasn’t sent down from the heavens as a way to smite us for all of our sins.
I see white chocolate, and I have the same reaction as I do when the Steelers go five-wide on third-and-1 from the goal line.
Why would I eat something that tastes like a plastic six-pack holder and has the texture of the seashell hand soap at my grandma’s house?
White chocolate is an abomination. It is a crime against humanity. It’s the dessert equivalent of what happened when all those animals came back to life in “Pet Cemetery.” It is unholy and unnatural.
It’s bad plain. And it’s bad mixed. I don’t like white chocolate mochas. I don’t like white chocolate chips in cookies. It even ruins raspberry cheesecake as a drizzled topping.
How can you ruin a raspberry cheesecake?! But it does. It … does!
White chocolate makes me so angry, I look at that bunny, and I just start rooting for a milk chocolate owl to swoop down from the skies and snatch it out of your hands to take it away to a fitting end.
This is the only “White Chocolate” I like.
Jason Williams turns 45
“White Chocolate” had some of the craziest handles in the NBA. pic.twitter.com/arjwn8WN9I
— ESPN (@espn) November 18, 2020
So, Chris, nay! Nay, I say! And don’t you dare pick me in this year’s company Secret Santa. I get the feeling I know what I’m gonna get.
OK. Back to much less important items.
R.J. has a bone to pick with Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin and owner Art Rooney II. Come to think of it, how many bones are in the human body? I think it’s 206, right? That’s about where R.J. is.
“So many things wrong! Where do I begin? He wants Ben back? WHY??
Seriously, Rooney ACTUALLY believed Tomlin had the Steelers prepared? Yeah, turnovers are not his fault, but game planning and having your defense ready surely are!!
Yunz (that’s how it used to be spelled until the yuppies moved in) fans know Tomlin simply folded down the stretch, Mr. Rooney. I guess he had them prepared for Washington & Cincy too?
Tomlin is the ‘Berlin Wall.’ He collapses on a yearly basis.”
Well, I’d argue that the Berlin Wall collapsed in one specific year. That would be 1989. And, technically, it was early November.
And, as we all know, Tomlin teams wait until December to collapse.
Hey, oh! Try the veal. Tip your waitress.
But, yes, to your point, it took four years for the physical wall to erode, get chipped apart and demolished.
Wait a minute, how long has it been since the Steelers last won a playoff game? Hmm. R.J., yinz may be on to something.
Sincerely,
A yuppie who moved in.
Brad would like a word or two on Tomlin and Big Ben as well.
“Ben thinks he is still elite. He isn’t. I believe the second half of the season is the real Ben.
So the Steelers are stuck with him for at least one more year. Mike (Tomlin) either doesn’t think there’s a problem or at least he’s not responsible for it. He seems helpless. Both these folks always say to the media, ‘I gotta do better. We gotta do better.’
And when it counts. They don’t do better. How is ‘better’ achieved if nothing is changed?”
Brad, I think you are essentially right. And I’ll take your point one step deeper.
My biggest concern is that “second-half Ben” was pretty close to the same guy in the first half. But the team played better around him. And opponents didn’t believe what they were looking at on film.
The run game was better early. The wide receivers were better early. The offensive line was better early. Defenses didn’t know how to handle Chase Claypool. The receivers didn’t have as many drops. The Steelers defense was getting the ball back more often and creating more negative plays.
And I still think that teams on the other sideline needed about 10 weeks to figure out the short passing game. And when they did, the Steelers didn’t have an answer except one time in the second half against the Indianapolis Colts.
Don’t get tricked by the big offensive numbers against the Cleveland Browns in the playoff game. That team was playing a prevent defense in the second quarter.
Basically, the last six weeks of the season were like taking one giant bite of white chocolate.
Have I expressed my opinions on white chocolate before? Oh, I did?
Good.
Kurt disagrees with the CBSSports.com mock draft of the Steelers trading up to select Alabama quarterback Mac Jones.
I’m pretty sure that’s accurate, except for the trade up part. And the QB in the first round part. But otherwise, spot on
— Kurt Krebs_Howard Hanna (@Kurt_Krebs_HH) February 23, 2021
Yup. That was basically my thinking, too, Kurt.
Here’s what’s suddenly interesting to me now, though, after Wednesday’s news. If the Steelers really are keeping Roethlisberger one more year, what becomes of backup quarterback Mason Rudolph? His contract is done after next year, too.
Since they have Dwayne Haskins, do they trade Rudolph for a pick? Do they let both quarterbacks walk after 2021 and then draft a pair or sign one and draft one in 2022?
Hmm. Sounds like Monday’s column to me.
“Mike Mc.” doesn’t think that Penguins fans are capable of seeing the forest through the trees.
“Pens fans are delusional, it’s like the talk of reacquiring Marc-Andre Fleury. How exactly would the Pens do that? The cupboard is bare, (draft) pick and prospect wise and they may or may not get a No. 1 for Kris Letang. Pens fans haven’t been in this position since the year 2002 and it shows.”
Well, Mike, they should be better aware. Remember 2015? They were awfully close to missing the playoffs then, and a sudden rebuild around the core was needed.
Thankfully that happened and it yielded a few more Stanley Cups. But now, they are wedged in the middle.
And, yes, the Fleury stuff is nuts because he’s been great. The Vegas Golden Knights are contending. And the Penguins have little to offer in return. So that deal would never happen. I think the upcoming decision of how to offset Jason Zucker’s loss is a huge indicator of how Brian Burke and Ron Hextall are viewing their own desire to chase another playoff run.
Lastly, Rick replied to a question posed while I was on WPXI’s “Final Word” Sunday night. “Will the Pirates go over or under the Las Vegas projected win total of 59.5 wins?”
63. Some of the kids will step up and they will far exceed the Vegas line
Only 99 losses.— Byng17 (@RickKetring) February 22, 2021
Yup, this is where we are with baseball in Pittsburgh. When you predict “only” 99 losses. And that makes you a cockeyed optimist.
Wow!
What’s next at PNC Park? White chocolate-flavored pierogies?
Tim Benz is a Tribune-Review staff writer. You can contact Tim at [email protected] or via Twitter. All tweets could be reposted. All emails are subject to publication unless specified otherwise.
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Penguins/NHL | Pirates/MLB | Sports | Steelers/NFL | Breakfast With Benz
